Eat Pray Love – I’d Rather Shampoo Rinse Repeat

I won’t be seeing Eat Pray Love. Nope, you can’t make me. Even with all the relentless television and radio ads.  Even though it’s co-written and directed by the highly successful GLEE co-creator Ryan Murphy. Unfortunately, his attempts at feature film are well…meh. His last turn in movies was the adaptation of Augusten Burrough’s Running with Scissors – apparently Mr. Murphy has an affinity for memoirs.  But other than some golden moments between Annette Bening and Alec Baldwin – the two should really make another movie together – Running with Scissors failed in weaving a believable story about a young man trying to find his way without a map out of the most bizarre world he inhabits. In fact, since the adaptation was released, Mr. Burrough’s has admitted to “embellishing” his memoir – a problem with the genre since the exposure of all the lies included in the work of James Frey’s A Million Little Pieces.

Now, I’m not saying that Elizabeth Gilbert lied in her highly successful memoir. As a writer she’s enormously talented. Her ability to form an effective narrative is extraordinary. And they don’t award the Pushcart to slackers. I believe her when she tells of lying in her bathroom and crying about her marriage, her life, blah, blah, blah.  But there are basically two camps when it comes to Gilbert’s work – those who believe it is a masterpiece in self-reflection, and those who think it is an indulgent, whiny tirade with little self discovery and too much observation.  I fall in the latter camp.

Here’s the thing – everybody whines. It should be a title of a REM song. And I’ll admit I’m pretty biased. You see, even though I didn’t go on my own global journey, I had a good trip to the hospital emergency room where I lay dying of a pulmonary embolism.  That was enough to put my whining in check. Now instead of spending time on my couch, pondering all the things wrong in my life, I think, “Why didn’t I die? Why am I here? Why am I alive?” I know…that’s deep…and those questions, believe me, are much easier to deal with while hooked up to a Morphine pump. But once the pump is gone…well, let’s just say one is left dazed and confused. It’s still not enough to make me pack up and go on some trip around the world to miraculously discover the answers to all my questions…to help in writing my story. Or see a movie about someone who tells her tale of how every question was answered with a magical adventure.

No, there will be no Eat Pray Love for me. Instead, I’ll Shampoo Rinse Repeat. That’s right. I’m taking a shower. I’m going to wash clean and start again.  That may sound really simple – bordering on Scarlett O’Hara’s, “Tomorrow is another day!” And so far I’m no closer to any answers in my story. In fact, I still have moments on the couch questioning – everything.  But the shower is always there and maybe someday I’ll get an answer. Or…maybe not…hopefully though, I will. Fingers crossed!

About Lottie Green

I'm a writer, content strategist, and all around creative guru. After earning my MFA in writing at Carnegie Mellon University, I embarked on a quest of making a living with words. It's been a fun, exciting, bumpy ride, and I haven't stopped yet.
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